I’m incredibly confident and I’m an introvert. An adventure and thrill seeking introvert, but an introvert none the less. I’m not outgoing. I can be the center of attention if I want to be, I can entertain with stories and tell jokes, but it’s not a goal or aim when I’m around people. I rather have meaningful conversations with one, or a few, intelligent people who stimulate my interest, and make me laugh.
Some people however, seem to confuse being outgoing with being confident. The two are definitely not synonymous – they are not one in the same. You can be confident and quiet. You can also be really outgoing and plagued with insecurities and fears.
Some people actually use being outgoing and strive to be the center of attention because they are filled with so much self-doubt.
A person can be all smiles, working the room…but in fact feel pretty miserable inside because they rather be doing something else. He feels trap in a role others expect of him, so he forces himself to keep up the charades. He isn’t confident enough to stand-up for himself and put an end to the madness.
Meanwhile, someone else might be standing alone in the corner, observing the room, not really talking to anyone until she finds the right person to strike up a great conversation with. That person is fully content, has nothing to prove and doesn’t give a you know what – what others think of her.
Guess who our confident person is? If you were just watching the scenario unfold though, without the inside scoop of their thoughts, emotions, and feelings – you would think the outgoing person was the confident one, but it’s all a facade. An extrovert is not automatically confident because he or she is naturally outgoing.
People fall for facades all the time. Unfortunately, people base what they want, desire, and seek in life based on the facades of others.
Learn and know who you are. Be clear who you want to be and then put in the work required to be that person. Be careful who you choose to emulate…you probably have no idea who they truly are.
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